Have a look at the picture below
What are the best three things you’ve achieved this week?
So, the weekend is here. Time, perhaps, for a little reflection. What have been the best things you’ve achieved during the week? What good things do these achievements say about you as a person?
I often set this task as a homework for clients between their first call and our first meeting.
Look at the picture above. What do you see? Did you know that there are nine faces hidden in this painting? I bet you only saw one, at first. You saw one face because that’s all you expected. Your brain chose to confirm your expectation.
What is confirmation bias?
Confirmation bias is the official term for our tendency to be watchful for things which confirm our beliefs and expectations. If you feel that the world is a nasty place then you will be ever alert for those things which confirm your view. Furthermore, anything which contradicts such beliefs will be ignored or devalued. This phenomenon is why people hold onto opinions despite the evidence to the contrary. Flat-Earthers and conspiracy theorists are prime examples of such people.
If you believe that you are a worthless piece of s*** then you will be seeing the things which appear to confirm your suspicions. You will be blind to your strengths and talents. You will believe that all compliments are insincere or offered because others are ‘just being nice’.
Confirmation bias conspires to keep self-esteem low
These things simply aren’t true. Such people have merely learned to notice the times when the lights were red. They pay attention when they are in the slowest queue. They simply don’t notice those times when they drove home without any traffic or when they breezed out of the supermarket without any real queuing at all.
So, the homework I mentioned is set in order to refocus the mind. It’s always good to begin looking for the positive things in life. It certainly beats dwelling on the bad things and, sooner than you would think, becomes the predominant outlook.
Whenever I meet a client I see through all the negative self-talk and spy the positive qualities, the strengths, the talents and the charm. I find it a real pity that so many people are unable to see these things for themselves. Well, that they can’t see them – YET!
They can, they will, they do. You could too. It’s my job to teach them to see the good in their own selves and to train themselves to be more charitable with regard to their characters, natures and personalities.
I dare you to swallow any discomfort you feel and to look yourself in the eye once per day. Tell yourself what those three best things are and tell yourself what good qualities you need to possess in order to achieve them.
These three best things don’t have to be anything dramatic. It might just be getting through the day. They’re simply a means of refocusing your attention on the twenty good things you do for every single thing you could have done better. You’ll begin to build a library of qualities which far outweigh any shortcomings.
Hypnotherapy could help you see yourself in a whole new way. The good is there, within you and it’s in everything you do. If you live in or around Reading, Wallingford, Thame, London or Oxford and would like to come to see yourself in a whole new light then please do consider giving me a call.
I’ve worked with hundreds of people in these towns and cities. They learned to achieve their goals and so could you.
You could either ‘phone me on 07786 123736 / 01183 280284 / 01865 600970, email me at email@example.com
You really could do it and you truly do deserve to. I would love to be able to help you.