You’re probably already well-versed in your worst qualities. What about the other side of the coin?


Words are powerful, as this video shows. How we talk to ourselves is crucial. This post talks, a little, about how you might begin to turn things around by changing the way you talk to yourself, about yourself.

The following story is typical and is an amalgamation of many different such stories. It is true and yet represents no one particular client. I tell it to convey a truth whilst preserving confidentiality.

One of my clients made a mistake during the past two weeks. He’d allowed this mistake to dominate his thinking and feelings for the second week. 

self-esteemThe first week had gone well. He’d begun to believe that he’d deserved things, to be good to himself, to feel positive about his future and about his own self.

And yet this mistake had wrecked it all. He’d forgotten about his positive qualities. He’d forgotten about the good things he does and is. This one mistake, a trivial incident in which he’d upset his partner for a couple of hours, had so weighed on his mind that all of the good qualities had been forgotten. His second week had threatened to undo all of the progress made in the first.

The following homework could help to prevent this over-exaggeration of mistakes, failings and weaknesses



I ask certain clients to write a list of their ten best qualities, the ten things they best like about themselves. Perhaps, if this task proves difficult, they can think back to nice things which others have said about them. 

It doesn’t matter what they are. They can be clever things they’ve done, kindnesses they’ve committed, talents, skills or any other form of personal quality.

The act of thinking through this task begins to help people to focus on something other than supposed weaknesses or failings. We all have those in abundance but we’re also valid human beings with a whole host of positive qualities. Deciding what these might be and doing more to make the most of them will help many a depressed or anxious person to see themselves more truly.

When you’ve written the list down, here’s what to do next

Write these ten best qualities out in a list. Stick it next to the mirror in which you brush your teeth. Read them to yourself every morning and evening. Decide what you can do to make the most of them during the day to come.

Keep an ear out for the nice things people say to you or about you. If they’re new to your list them add them to the bottom. Begin to build a long and comprehensive list of your positive traits and achievements and step by step you’ll begin to retrain your brain to focus on something other than gloom.

Hypnotherapy could help this list to lodge in your brain

I use hypnotherapy in Reading, Oxford, London, Wallingford and Thame to help this growing awareness of positive traits to sink into the unconscious mind.I help people to begin to see that they’re more than a list of miserable negatives. You could learn to free yourself from self-defeating self-criticism and hypnotherapy could help you.

Contact me when you’re ready to move forward into greater self-esteem and confidence

contact resolved hypnotherapy

I offer warm, effective and professional hypnotherapy for conidence and self-esteem in London, Reading, Oxford, Wallingford and Thame. If you’d like some help to rebuild your sense of positivity and self-regard then you could call me on 07786 123736 / 01183 280284 / 01865 600970 or 020 7193 9331

You could email me at

You could also contact me using the contact form below.

However you choose to get in touch I look forward to hearing from you and to helping you to feel more positive about the person you are.

Best wishes

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